Interviewers: Lux Darkbloom and Jimena Prieto Andrew
Interview Subject: Melaney 

Melaney: My name is Melaney. I have three siblings. The three of them are younger than me. I have a brother and two sisters. My mom and dad have Mexican backgrounds, so do we, me and my siblings. They come from Mexico, specifically down like the down edge of California, like Baja California Sur. They come from there. They’re actually immigrants, and they wanted to move here for me and my siblings to have a better life. 

Lux: What motivated you to pursue higher ed and attend the U of U? 

Melaney: Well, I always wanted to go to a university when I was very young. I wanted to seek higher education in order to gain, you know, more knowledge and to have a better job in the future. Like my mother, my father, they always told me, “Oh, if you seek higher education, you get a better job, like a better high paying job.” So did my teachers, my professors–they all told me that. And like, there’s certain classes that I like to take, too, that I’ve seen here at the U. Like for example, this one called, like, “The Happiness of the Good Life.” And the professor is really nice. I love her. She made this, like, activity log, and we have to do it throughout the semester. And so, like, one of them was going to museums or going to like a park and like, just like, you know, just do recreational activities, leisure time, stuff like that.

Lux: Stuff that’s enriching and nourishing for you. Would you say that there were any specific role models or folks who really encouraged you and supported you? 

Melaney: There’s a history teacher that I had back in high school. Like throughout my seventh to 12th grade year, throughout all those years, he was always there. And he was a bit of a cold-hearted one, but like he clearly cared about us. Like he had that facade of like, “Oh, I’m mean, I’m rude.” But then he’s actually, like, underneath he’s soft. He actually cares about us and everything. And it was just so funny because like, yeah, he just inspired me to gain a better education. Yeah. I would also say my parents since they never went to a university or college. Like, I just wanted them to be proud of me for going to seeking higher education. So yeah.

Lux: So what year are you in school right now? 

Melaney: This is my second semester. So like, I guess like, you know, first year. 

Lux: Very good. Are you full-time? 

Melaney: Yes, right now, yes. 

Lux: Cool. And do you have, like, a part-time or full-time job in addition to school?

Melaney: No, right now I’m gonna seek one. Actually, over the summer right now, I’m probably gonna not do classes this summer and just focus on getting money so that I could pay for fall semester and all that.

Lux: That is wise, very wise. Do you think that being first generation has impacted your choice of major or, like, your career path? 

Melaney: Not really. I just, I just, so when I was young, I always loved to write. Like throughout my entire life, I’ve been writing, writing, writing, like creative stories, like, you know, fantasy, adventure, all that stuff. And so really, I just, I already knew what I wanted to be when I came in. So yeah. 

Lux: That’s cool. So are you an English major or writing? 

Melaney: Yes, English major. I wanted to get a creative writing minor, but like that, apparently it’s intertwined with my class and all that stuff. So I’m like, “Oh, you know what? Might as well not do it.” [Unintelligible] Because my advisor also told me that your creative writing hours also count towards, like, a minor. So. Okay. It’s like the same thing. So yeah. 

Lux: Has being first-generation impacted your ability to pay tuition or to acquire financial aid? 

Melaney: No, actually. So, since me and my family, we’re quite poor. We don’t really have much financial aid and all that stuff. I already finished my FAFSA for this year. Thankfully. 

Lux: Thank goodness.

Jimena: Yes

Melaney: Right now, I’m barely surviving off the For Utah scholarship. I got it, you know, like before I applied here and all that. And I’m using that. And then there’s also, like, other scholarships from the government or the federal and all that stuff. They’re providing me with, like, other scholarships and federal grants, all that stuff. I’m just living off of that for now. My family, whenever they have the money, they’ll give me some in order to, like, pay off the rest of my tuition. Right now my tuition is fully paid off, thankfully. And yeah, so this summer I’m going to get a job and just, you know, not worry my parents about them giving me money. So yeah. I mean, right now I am working on my gen eds. Like, like I’ve asked people around, “Would you prefer doing your bachelor’s [courses] first or your generals first?” And I’ve heard that they told me, “Do generals first.” And I always knew that. And then one of my friends, they were all, he was all like, “No, focus on your bachelor’s.” I’m all like, “No, focus on my generals.” It’s a lot better to get like math what we’re done with. 

Lux: Right. Absolutely. Do you feel that being a first generation student has had an impact on your academic success? 

Melaney: Not really. I mean, well, since like First-Gen [Scholars], like at the end of each class, they provide announcements. First-Gen [Scholars] in a way, gives me a further insight in the U because I get like, “Oh, this event is happening, and it might help me with my financial status,” or like, “It might help with my mental health.” And so in a way it does, like– It’s like a treat. Like First-Gen [Scholars] and it extends out to be like, “Oh, this event here, this event there,” all that. 

Lux: So have you been in first gen since the very beginning? 

Melaney: Yes. 

Lux: Very good. It sounds like through that program, you’ve learned about a lot of resources and services on campus. 

Melaney: Yes. Definitely. Like, I didn’t know that there was a Women’s Resource Center. I also didn’t know about, like, the–what’s it called?–the Learning Center existed either. I’m all like, wow. So I need to utilize that. 

Lux: So in [your] generals, do you feel like faculty are talking about these resources and services much, or is it mostly like you’ve learned about them through First-Gen [Scholars]? 

Melaney: There’s also been other people, yeah, that have been telling me like, TRIO–mostly about TRIO–they tell me about that. I recently went to the Dream Center, and they also told me about other things and . . .

Lux: Do faculty ever identify themselves as first gen? 

Melaney: No, I haven’t heard anyone tell me that, so yeah. 

Lux: Do you feel like that– Maybe whether or not it’s like a lack of knowledge on the faculty’s part, do you feel like their not sharing those resources could potentially impact your success academically as a student–a first-gen student–or other first-gen students? This is speculative, but that’s okay. 

Melaney: I mean, not really. They have their own, like, I guess support, like rights in order to disclose this information if they want to or not. And also from what I’ve heard, like if people say that like you’re first gen, they assume things. And maybe those assumptions are, like, bad, like, “Oh, maybe you’re Mexican because like your parents never went to higher, seek higher education. Or your parents are from, like, this area because like, oh, like, they’d never, yeah” . . . 

Lux: Gotcha, so like some like racialized assumptions. 

Melaney: Exactly, because like, you know, like poor countries are seen as like, “Oh, you’re never gonna seek higher education. You’re too poor, you . . .” yeah, like that stuff. 

Lux: So, as a first-generation student, do you feel that your status has impacted your social or emotional wellbeing on campus? 

Melaney: No, just being first-gen, I just, I see as like a medal, like, “Oh, I’m proud of being first-gen. I’m gonna make my family proud. I’m gonna make my friends proud, my former teachers in high school proud” because, like, I’m doing this for myself and also for others to make them proud, so.

Lux: Yeah, so one of the things that the university talks a lot about is the value of having a sense of belonging on campus. And in the last graduating class, there was a survey given to them asking, “Do you feel a sense of belonging on campus?” And around 60% said yes. So it’s almost a 50-50 split, which is pretty significant. But as far as your experience on campus, do you feel like the institution has created the ability for you to feel a sense of belonging here? 

Melaney: I will admit during my first semester here, I really did not feel like I belonged. Obviously, I just moved from high school to here. So I felt like, “Oh, no, I don’t have any friends. I don’t have all this stuff.” Yeah, and so I didn’t feel like I belonged. I felt like I was lower than anybody else, like I didn’t deserve to be here and all that stuff. But then once my friend started talking to me, she came here too from West High, and she started talking to me about how, “Hey, you belong here. You’re seeking higher education. You’re a first-gen,” and all that stuff. And she encouraged me to keep seeking higher education and all that stuff. And so currently, she’s in South Korea, learning abroad and all that stuff. And my mom has also given me advice. She was all like, “Hey, focus on your education. Sure, you can make friends, but focus on your education.” And in a way, I’ve learned to be alone, but not in a bad sense. And it just– I don’t know, in a sense, it makes me feel like I belong here. I’m just being alone, just doing all my classes, talking to my professors and all that stuff. I feel like I belong really well. 

Lux: Yeah, you feel self-sufficient. 

Melaney: Yeah. 

Lux: Do you think that there’s a sense of welcoming for first-gen students broadly, beyond the specialized programs for first-gens? 

Melaney: Yeah. 

Lux: If you have any guidance that you would wanna provide to students who would be future first-gens?

Melaney: Ooh, okay. Number one, always make friends because you need a good community in order to get through. It’s really difficult. When I was first here, I was like, “Oh gosh, there’s a lot of assignments,” and all that stuff. And so through friends that have experience here, they’ll give you advice, too, in order to get through all this. And they tell you their experience, they tell you just everything. And then you’d be ready for the next semester or stuff like that. And also, get a job and get money before coming to the U. I didn’t do that because I was too lazy to get a job and everything. And I struggled paying off my tuition the first semester. I was all like, “Oh no, I’m not gonna be able to pay it off.” But I did, thankfully. And so yeah, get some money beforehand.

Apply for scholarships every single day. Don’t forget about it. You have to do it. If it’s no essay, then yeah. But then also, I was lazy to apply for scholarships before the U. I was like, “I’ll be fine.” But then it came and like, “Nope, I’m not good.” And actually, currently now, I’m kind of still being lazy about it. Because they all require essays a lot of the time. You’re like, “Oh, I don’t want to. I’m not in the state of mind for that.” You just don’t want to. Because you don’t want to waste your time writing it and then just not get the scholarship. And you’re like, “I wasted my time.” And yeah.

Lux: Can you talk a little bit more about that scholarship process? What does that typically look like? You mentioned that you have to write an essay. So what sort of essay topics do they tend to suggest? 

Melaney: There’s this one essay about– I think it was writing about technology and how it has affected our world negatively. And, you know, we’re in the future. Technology is expanding, it’s advancing. And eventually, it’ll become just a huge thing. And then it won’t be a good thing because we won’t be focusing on ourselves. We won’t be focusing on other people. We’ll be focusing on just pure technology and just talking to AI and all that stuff. And, but yeah, just writing that essay about all that. And it’s like a limit or no limit. 

Lux: Oh, like a word limit.

Melaney: Yeah 

Lux: Got you. 

Melaney: And just writing all that, taking an hour or two, submitting it, the deadline, they’ll let you know if you get it or not. You’re waiting and waiting until you don’t get it. And you’re like, “Oh, I wrote that for nothing.” There’s also another essay, actually. It’s a little bit of a personal one, but it’s about leukemia, and it’s about blood cancer. And I was like, “Hey, I could get this one” because I actually have leukemia myself. I got blood cancer when I was in 2018, 2016 around there. And I was all like, “Ooh, sensitive topic.” But I wanted to do it. It’s actually due tomorrow, and I gotta do it soon. But yeah, I’ll be doing it today once I get home and everything. 

Lux: Do you feel like there’s a lot of components of those scholarship materials that you have to submit where you can reuse them at all or reformat that existing info for other scholarships?

Melaney: Well, if I apply for the same scholarship, they have a different topic each time. And you won’t be able to reuse it. But for other scholarships, if they have the same or similar topic, then yeah, I would use it, but just revise it in a way so that it’s a lot better, so that they could consider it more and all that stuff. Yeah. 

Lux: And more tailored to the requirements of that scholarship. Yep. Gotcha, cool. Thank you so much for coming this way and talking to us. 

Melaney: Of course.